28
Feb

After Surgery

It has been sometime since my total right knee replacement surgery. To say the least, the journey began well before my day of surgery.

I spent weeks reading and organizing all the information my doctor provided, gathering food and supplies, cleaning the house and yard, this and that, as in my mind I assumed I would be laid up for at least six weeks…unable to drive a car which for a senior is one scary thought. There is little so “threatening” to freedom as not being able to hop in the car and go for an adventure, to the store.

I may have overprepared; yet I am happy I did as I had no idea how many hours of home and outside therapy there would be after surgery. I imagined weeks of writing my next novel, working on the website – wrong – I was too tired from all the therapy, medications and simply slept a lot.

For weeks, my right knee was so swollen, my whole leg felt like a massive tree limb. Each time my therapist said “move it just a little more” I felt as if my surgical stitches were ripping apart. Even now my body is slowly accepting a knee of metal and plastic (which I have been told might take a year for my body to accept its new hardware). And, for some time my right leg moved one way and my left the other. I drew a small but well entertained crowd the first time I went to the store.

But all in all, three months past surgery, I’m glad I did it. My medical care was excellent. Thank you, Linda and Cleon, for picking me up after surgery. Linda is a very gifted birder. Check out Linda’s site at “BirdingBeyondtheFieldGuide.com”.

Yet for all of the outstanding care, it is now up to ME to take it the rest of the way…that is the hard part…when one has to take responsibility for the outcome.

I have not abandoned my goal to enter the Senior Olympics but things have truly changed. Besides, goals can give a reason to get up in the morning but goals, and dreams, are “fluid”. Every day is a new day and despite our plans, our desires, each day brings new challenges and a new “self”. Life is not stagnant nor are we.

So, where do I go from here? Climb an ancient archeological site – what else? Nothing like a “new” goal to breathe life into an old one! But to do that, I must change plans a bit.

After surgery. I was taller on the right side. I am now a slanted woman! To prevent developing bilateral hip problems which may necessitate hip surgery, I will have a total left knee replacement. Not that I really want to but I’ve known for years both knees needed surgery due to severe arthritis and bone problems.

Now that I am “slanted”, training for any competition causes a bit of hip pain; but I don’t want pain to stop exercising or smash my goal to climb that ancient site. Until my next surgery, I will use a left shoe lift to ease any pain.

Yes, goals are ladened with deterrents, not just surgery! Unpredictable public pool and gym access, poor travel weather, daily challenges of being the “honey” in the honey do list, appointments, money and most detrimental of all…ME. I get so lost in the mechanics (planning, writing, retirement excuses) that I do not seek that which is most important to me…magnificence.

Magnificence is that wonderous light, that spark of magic, which resides in all things be it a tree, a rock, an animal, a person, every adventure and goal. It teases with magically illusion and promises enlightenment.

I must admit it would be great to join the circle of Olympic winners, at the age of 80, have a book published by a real book publisher, a successful website; but more importantly, my goals are a means of keeping my mind sharper, my body healthier, creating imaginary worlds with my writing and reminding myself to hold to heart that which I truly seek…magnificence…with a well needed dash of fun.

After surgery, during those long hours of lying in bed with my gigantically swollen right leg attached to an exercise machine, I realized that I have cluttered my life with a massive number of daily goals which only led to frustration and disappointment in myself. I was losing sight of what I truly desire and that is magnificence. It was then I decided to streamline what I was doing.

I created another chart, as I am ridiculously organized and need a reminder of the day’s chores. But a chart of a kinder nature, a hint of past success and failures and with a more realistic understanding that life is fluid, so should be the chart.

I need to concentrate on those areas of most concern: backstroke swimming, power walking, beauty (face, body, hair), intensified climbing abilities to reach an ancient archeological site, building strength with a better diet, spot exercising, setting priorities, further improving my right knee after surgery, prepare for a left knee surgery, and magnificence, most important of all. As for as writing my current novel, the website and social media or taking video, all of that is from inspiration and, for me, inspiration is not something I can put in a chart or force.

For each area of concentration, I looked to past failures and successes and chose one, or two goals to meet. Then, I created a streamlined chart not only as a daily reminder but also a means of tracking progress for future changes.

I encourage anyone who is thinking of pursuing their goals to follow their own path to success. I hope I have provided some “food for thought” to aid you in your pursuits.

Before I go, I must say whatever you follow, follow it with positivity and not negativity. I have seen life’s ruined from negativity. There are simply too many people out there who will put you down, for the tiniest of reasons, and most destructively under the veil of laughter.

You have worth whether you are new to this world or a hundred years old or beyond – whether an animal, a rock, a tree or even a human as each has that spark of magnificence within. Growth will come from nurturing that spark of nobility and not seeking the admiration others.